Comfort Food

Rice and beans and cheese. Warm soft food. Maybe with a belly full, my heart would not feel empty.  Maybe if I ate something, I would feel better.  Blame it all on the lack of protein. Need more iron. Need more vitamins. Eat it. Drink it. Drink more. Eat more. Higher alcohol contents. Better saturated fats.

Chocolate. Cake. Pie. Sugar. Stuff it down and the rest will melt away, like sugar cubes in a warm cup of tea — with milk. Watch it all dissolve like the magic that transforms lemon, butter, and egg yolk into hollandaise.  A cracked egg brings miracles.

Open the fridge, grab the first thing. Smother it in BBQ sauce. Remind you of summer — good times. Lazy days. And reading lists. Breaths of fresh air that come too infrequently. Lost, perhaps forever — in the sound of rush hour traffic. What I’d give for a patch of fresh-cut grass and a sweating glass of lemonade. Breathe.

Dive, head first. Ice cream. Pudding. A soft landing. Thinking of nothing but the smooth comfort sliding down your throat — red jello to tonsillitis.

Quick fixes. Drive throughs. On the go. On the way. Going places, never stagnant. Fries with that. Outside the bun. I’m lovin’ it. Eat. More. Chicken.

Down the hatch, around the bend. We won’t rest until we get some. Sweet smells. Grandma’s house. Pumpkin pie and fall. Seasons change with the flavors. Rice Krispies trees with green food coloring. Mouths stained for days — happy. Past yet not forgotten, lingering on the tongue.

Maybe if I ate something, I would be content. Fill up the empty spaces, left by the confusion of a misdirection, with a grande bean burrito. A missed step. A back track, smothered in gravy. It won’t be low fat.

Weight: Couldn’t bring myself to weight  How do you feel?: Is there a less complicated question? Small Victory: I have not yet eaten all the chocolate in the cupboard.  Biggest Disappointment: I have eating most of the chocolate in the cupboard.  Thing I appreciated about my body this week:  I have one. I am still alive. Reason I am  #embraceablenow: I care too much.

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