Oh Yeah, That’s The Spot

I have a secret… I give incredibly good massages. And not like how Monica thinks she gives good massages:

But I am actually incredibly good at them.  I have very strong hands. I understand muscle patterns. I have a good sense when something is out of alignment — I’m just generally amazing at it. I also only give massages to the top 1% of the people I love most in the world that they remain rare and special (the massages not the people, the people are always rare and special). There are very very few people who I will give a massage to. Ashley is one of them, you can ask her how good I am at it. My Grandmother used to beg me to go into it professionally so that I could “bless” as many people as possible with my gift.

This gift has one downside however, I hate getting massages. My whole life I have hated having people try and rub my shoulders. The main reason for this is that I have a stubborn arrogance problem where I think I could do it better than whoever is doing it (and I usually can) or that they don’t do it with enough pressure to make a difference. I will only ask someone to give me a massage if I desperately need it, and even then it’s usually me asking Ashley to dig her elbow into one spot on my back for about a minute — I hate massages. Then something happened…

I am presently between jobs and attempting to figure out what to do with my life. In this limbo, my friend and mentor Christine (once my beloved professor) is letting me do odd jobs like paint, organize, clean etc… at her house that I may be able to pay my rent. Recently after a long day of setting up for and running a garage sale with her, she turned to me and said, “would you like to go get a full-body massage with me? My treat?” Now… there are two things you need to know, the first you are already aware of — I hate massages. The other is that pretty much anything could proceed the phrase “my treat” and I’d be down for it. “Want to backpack through the desert in July without water? My treat.” Sure!

Wanting to spend more time with my friend and not wishing to turn down a new adventure, I said yes, despite my despise of massages to my first professional massage. So, we hopped into the car and headed to her favorite spot.

We arrived and I was relieved to find that these were not naked massages. Once in Costa Rica, I got a full-body chocolate wrap and, well, enough of me was seen by that woman with her chocolate brush to fulfill my stranger-nude quota for a century.

So I got on the table in the serene and dark room. I breathed deeply, trying to relax. They dipped my feet into a bowl of warm water and immediately I could feel all the tension in my body release. People, I don’t know what I was thinking I LOVE MASSAGES!!! For an hour I fell into a trance as a magical woman took ancient knots out of my shoulders, even those placed there by that bully Marcia Camacho in the third grade. Every pain, ache, and trauma that had accumulated in my overdramatic and utterly privileged body flowed out of me until I was made new, laying as if without bones next to their fish tank.

Walking out of the room, I thanked Christine profusely. The thing about true teachers, is how they change your life without knowing it — simply by their generosity in helping you experience things you otherwise would never have, be it a new interpretation of Shakespeare or a full-body massage. Thank you Christine, for everything!

The lesson to be gleaned from all of this is that I had for so long ignored my body. I simply tried to medicate it with food. I did not know there were things I could do for my body — to care for my body. Let’s add massages and eating roast green beans to that list. It’ll be a while until I can afford massages of my own, but I tell you,  I intend to care for myself in the future with lots, and lots, of massages.


Weight: Unsure  How do you feel?: In want of another massage Small Victory: Today I went to an ice cream place after having been in Santa Barbara and having INCREDIBLE ice cream at McConnells and it was very disappointing. So I took a few bites and threw it away. I would NEVER have done that in my past life. Biggest Disappointment: I tried on a few dresses for Ashley’s rehearsal dinner today. I thought I was down a size. I don’t think that I am, alas and alack — but I bought a cute dress nonetheless and I feel beautiful in it.  Thing I appreciated about my body this week:  My hair is pretty awesome. #embraceablenow: I give amazing massages.

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