Last October, I started watching The Walking Dead.
I watched all six Netflixable seasons in two and a half weeks, thereby dethroning my previous binging record of watching eight seasons of Grey’s Anatomy in four (while working on my masters degree) [actually, you know what, that still wins].
My obsession with The Walking Dead was uncontrollable. For months all I thought about was zombies. Since watching The Walking Dead, I have procured a zombie emergency kit and a bow/arrow (yes, I am not kidding, you can ask Ashley — I got a bow and arrow for the use of defense against the Zombie apocalypse). I am still looking for a machete and a crossbow [and legal counsel as to whether or not it is legal to own a crossbow in California], and I am hoping to enroll in knife fighting lessons later this fall. They teach you longsword, dagger, and rapier (thank you Burbank, you nerdy, nerdy town).
I know it is all fake, of course. There will not be a zombie apocalypse…. except that my father who I got hooked on TWD keeps pointing out the Bible verse Revelation 9:6 that says in the end of days, “men will seek death and will not find it; they will long to die, but death will escape them.” So, yeah know, that’s comforting.
I started preparing for the zombie apocalypse after I realized two things 1) I am out of shape and could not outrun zombies for long at the moment, so fighting is my only option 2) I am Carol.
Carol from The Walking Dead is an incredible character. Using her domestic talents, she manipulates her way into people’s trust, making them think she is weak and trustworthy. She is as likely to bake you a pie as stab you in the head (and in this universe, the later is far more likely due to the lack of ovens). She is violently loyal. She stops at nothing to protect the ones she loves with a kill first ask questions never attitude. I’m afraid I am the same way. If I sense a threat amongst my dear ones, I seek to eradicate it, ripping it to shreds with my bare hands (or vicious rhetoric).
All that to say, I ached for the chance to be a part of a Zombie apocalypse to prove myself in the face of ever-present danger… I also ache to get into shape due to the impending threat of zombies, The Hunger Games, and heart disease — Well, the opportunity came in a very simple app — Zombies, Run!
After a month of not working out due to a foot injury (I have planter fasciitis), I decided to ignore my foot,and really start training for my half-marathon. So I downloaded the Zombies, Run! app and completed my first mission… here are my stats:
I am “Runner 5” and I picked up batteries and water while Runner 8 interrogated me about my whereabouts. Zombies were breathing down my neck as I out ran them (complete with neck-prickling sound effects in my earbuds) it was fantastic! I ran/walked (okay, trotted/mostly walked) nearly three miles. It’s not much (especially in one hour), but as they say, a journey of 13.1 miles begins with one zombie attack.
The whole time, my legs ached and I could feel my foot begging me to stop, but I kept running (trotting/walking) all the while thinking of Carol and what she would do. She didn’t take it lying down when she had a stab wounded to the thigh, and neither would I! …
Now. Five hours later, I cannot walk. My left foot is in agonizing pain and does not recognize the soothing powers of Advil or icing. Here’s the lesson, my friends, do not run injured — even if zombies are chasing you. Start small. Start slow. Be smart.
Weight: Probably 206lbsish I am attending my first WW meeting tomorrow, I haven’t been in a while How do you feel?: In agonizing foot pain Small Victory: I got out of the house and exercised and I have been eating very healthy this week Biggest Disappointment: Cursed foot! Thing I appreciated about my body this week: It is healthy (except a foot) #embraceablenow: I’m a dork.